Intimacy and Connection

My 5 Transformational Truths about Connection and Intimacy

Having dappled with being a sole trader (or as I like to call it a soul trader) for over three years, and from time to time, having my finger in the employment pie, whether it be as a full-timer or part-timer, it was time that I finally took the plunge and rocked the world of entrepreneurship.

Ups, Downs and Whirlwinds later, I am starting to find my feet in this luscious land of being my own BOSS, which by the way, took a while for me to get a handle on. No more ‘asking permission’ to do anything.  No more ‘justifications’. No more having to ask for time off ! (yeeha) I am finally the CEO of my own life, and I’m LOVING IT! Of course there are times, when the uncertainty gets the better of my psyche, but to be honest – all it takes are a few hours away from the screen, reading, walking or hanging out at the dog park with Marvin, and I’m reset & recharged.

The one thing that I wasn’t prepared for though, was the craving I now have for connection. Don’t get me wrong, I still teach Yoga, and host Essential Oil Classes around Australia. I’m on the phone All. Day. Long. But it’s not that I’m lonely. I mean, I’m an only child, and my bliss is being left alone to enjoy good quality ‘me time’. Drop me in the idle of no-where, and I’ll be as happy as a pig in poofie.
I’m talking about REAL connection. The type you find with people you work with every day. The checking-in every morning with a cuppa joe to find out how the few hours spent apart the night before went. The constant questioning and true concern about your home life. Your feelings, your worries, your experiences. You know what I mean?

Human beings are hardwired for connection and intimacy.  It’s the vulnerability aspect of true friendships that allow us to crack open and bare all. The ‘knowing’ that there is no judgment over our perception of situations, and the ability to be completely honest and truthful about our deepest darkest secrets.  So it’s no surprise (hindsight has 20/20 vision right?) that this is the one aspects of my new life, that I truly miss.

Over the years, I have loved deepening my connection with myself and researching the Divine within. I thought that I was confident in understanding and experiencing authentic relationships in all areas of my life.  Turns out that nothing prepares you for the effort required to reach out and create deep authentic connections, especially when you’re working by your lonesome.

Truly divine connections come when we do our best to honour and understand ourselves, and we’re able to wear our hearts on our sleeves. That’s the key to rocking relationships.

When you look back at how humans have lived throughout history, it’s always been about connection.

We used to live in tribes, and have our friends and families look after one another’s children.

Indigenous people live, breath, and participate in this kind of world still.  

They collaborate and celebrate life’s happenings. They live in harmony with a reverence for life, in a ‘you and me’ world. Not a ‘you or me’ me world.

Is this what has driven us apart as a culture? Have we lost our soul connections because of competition? Distinctions of living life in scarcity instead of sufficiency?

We have seriously lost touch with the importance of connection, community and celebration?

In the aggressive ‘money-culture’ that we live in, where we’re always craving more. More Money, Bigger Houses, Faster Cars. Are we missing out on experiencing the sensuous flows that invite intimacy with the present moment?

Should we instead be striving for More intimacy?  More connection?  More real, raw and authentic relationships?  And more fulfilment?

And if so, how do we boost intimacy & connection? Not only the sexual intimacy that we have with our partners and spouses, but that with ourselves and those close to us in our lives?

Here is what I have found to be true:

  1. Nothing beats connecting in real life, because common goals = true connection and a room of babes = laughs. ALL the best bits. My goal for the first half of 2017?  Connection 
  2. Meditation is the no.1 key to cementing the connection with ourselves. Sometimes a silent meditation is perfect, and sometimes guided meditations are da bomb. I have so much respect for Esther Hicks, and her Abraham Hicks Relationships Meditation (not just for love-relationships but for all connections with other people) is my go-to reminder of how important it is to stay connected.
  3. When fear motivates me to pull the curtains shut… that’s when I do myself — and you, and women —  a disservice. So in setting the intention to truly connect with ya’all, I’m bearing all and fuelling my courage with authentic and fearless conversations.
  4. Essential oils increase spiritual awareness and connection. The physical therapeutic benefits & also the moment of tender loving connection when applying them to the body, brings an instant sense of connection. There are so many ways to connect without the saying a word. I connect with my yoga students in savasana by giving them a little head massage with the oils. I connect with my husband by rubbing his feet with Lavender, Vetiver and Hawaiian Sandalwood before bed. Not a word said, but whole lot of connection right there. THAT creates connection.
  5. The intention to simply bring more celebration, creativity and connection to our everyday, with all forms of expression, invites us to hold the principles of what’s going on in our hearts and minds as a complex tool. Tools of inquiry & connection. By setting this intention EveryDamnDay, we can start to conjure up the consistency of self-inquiry, which will only lead to more true, authentic and honest relationships. Full of connection and love.

The butterflies in my belly are fluttering in anticipation of the months to come. I hope you decide to join me and this fast-growing and engaged community for this experience of learning, connection, and positive change in how we practice intimacy and change the way we live, love and connect.

What have you found to be true about connection? Do you have any truths you’d like to share with us?  Anything that you’d like to declare for the upcoming months?

 

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